Picture Of An alleged iPhone 6 Thief Goes Viral!

Picture of a lady wanted by the Police for allegedly stealing an iphone 6 and 128gb at an iStore Apple Store at Nelson Mandela Square, Johannesburg, South Africa, on Friday, 14th April, 2017 at about 7:22pm local time, trends on the Internet.

A man, supposed to be the husband of the theft victim shared the picture alongside the text below:

"This lady stole my wife's iPhone 6 Plus 128gb at iStore Apple Store at Nelson Mandela Square in Jo'Burg yesterday 14th April 2017 at 7:22pm. The theft has been reported to the SA Police. The phone has been tracked to No. 91 Hunter Street in Jo'Burg when it was last turned on. Anyone who recognizes the lady in Jo'burg should please alert the police. Please share this on all your social media contacts. Thanks."

Discovered 13 Billion Naira, What Next?

A lot has played out in the Political, Economic, even Entertainment and health sectors of Nigeria. The aim of this discussion, bothers on the recently reported discovery of the sum of 13 billion Naira cash found in apartment 7b, otherwise called "Apartment Dash-Dash", in Osborne Towers, Ikoyi, Lagos - Nigeria.

Apartment 7b was referred to as "Dash-Dash" because in the records of ownership, two dash (--) appeared in lieu of ownership identity. "Whistle blowers" of apartment dash dash were revealed to be ex-security guards at the residential building, who according to reports, enjoyed some level of largess, or "dash-dash" from a haggardly dressed woman, who repeatedly brought huge bags containing what is believed to be money, to the apartment. According to one of the whistle blowers, he received the sums of 10,000 and 500 naira respectively, on two occasions, when he helped the woman with the bag(s) of money.

Dialogue: 

Crowd at a Newspaper stand at a popular bus-stop in a major Nigerian Metropolis.

Vendor: Please, I will not entertain free reading of any kind today, better hold your =N=70 if you wan read today's news. I no fit shout abeg.

Reader 1, an unemployed middle aged man: In this harsh economic situation you are requesting for =N=70...to read Newspaper...you no dey pity people?

Reader 2: Don't mind him, now he will blame it on the Dollar..wasn't it =N=50 before now..or do you have to fly to the U.S to get the papers?

Reader 1: No he went to the Moon....sighs

Vendor made to pack up his papers..Reader 2 puts his right hand into his right trouser pocket and brought out a rumpled =N=50 note, he asked Reader 1 if he has =N=20 on him. Reader one gave him a squeezed =N=20 note. He hands it over to the vendor.

Vendor: So the two of you wants to share a =N=70 readership???

Reader 1: Mr man what's your problem, we never pay you?

Reader 3, an elderly man in his 50s approach the Newspaper stand...hands the Vendor a =N=100 note...and picks up one of the Newspapers.. 

Reader 2: Picks one of the Newspapers with a screaming headline..."=N=13 Billion Discovered in An Ikoyi Apartment". 

Flips through to the page where the story is written.

Mumbles...Mmmm these people have come again.

Reader 1: Peeks into the paper...screams...13 billion whaaaat?

Reader 3: Flips his paper to the page.....what on earth have we turned into in this country?

Vendor: The question should be "what on earth have some of our so called leaders turned to"?

Reader 4, a young man in his 20s arrived the stand: 

..Most of them are callous thieves... that's what they turned to, a long time ago...is it not the ikoyi apartment money? I already saw it online

Reader 3: Can you imagine...a whooping =N=13 billion starched away in an apartment...meanwhile most of us are yet to get our gratuity after retirement...not to talk of pension...nah so so "money no dey -money no dey" we dey hear. 

Vendor: Well..we don see where some of the money bin dey...in apartment "Dash-Dash".

Reader 1: With hands folded on his chest as if he was catching cold.

...Meennnn this is heartless...and here I am job-hunting since the past 1 year that I lost my job...every where I go, I get turned down due to "recession"; most companies are not recruiting.

Reader 4: Laughs...but bros...you are not new in Naija nah....you suppose don sabi your people wella...job deyooo, you fit begin blow whistle.

Reader 3: As unto referee that he is abii, can you get serious for once?

Reader 2: And what do you mean "sabi your people"? does it mean something good cannot always come out from some of these people...must it be one heist after another...

Reader 3: Cuts in...This one go come thief him own, another one go come..thief him own...like say nah competition of who thief pass.

Reader 2: By the way, WHO owns that apartment?

Everyone chorused : WHO you dey ask?

Reader 4: Are we EFCC?

Vendor: Or are we CBN?

Reader 2: That is the million Dollar question...WHO owns the apartment?

Reader 4: Bros..the way I see the situation now...nah only that apartment waka comeooo.

Laughter

Reader 3: Yes now, as every one suddenly don deny any knowledge of WHO owns the apartment.

Reader 4: They should go and look for "Dash-Dash"...nah him get the apartment.

Laughs

Reader 1: This is not funny at all..

Everyone replies almost at once: Watin you want make we do?

Reader 3: Since they are shameless...make we help them out nah...who are they deceiving?

Reader 2: Right now...there is not much to say..until the culprit is identified...

Reader 3: And announced to the pubic...because nah our money be that...nah the Nigerian masses money be that...not after a while they will cover the case after collecting their own share.

Reader 4: But that has always been the case...were you expecting any difference in this case? 

Everyone: Lets keep our fingers crossed

Reader 1: True, lets give them the benefit of doubt...and see how this plays out...

Reader 4: We are watching and waiting...patiently....meanwhile... its like I will join this "whistle blowing" Businessooo, seems like that is where the money is. See as those ex-guards don hammer.

Reader 2: I hope these "whistle blowers" are being protected....make them no go blow whistle disappear into thin air.

Lights out!

Refractory: Nigerian Senator Chants Battle Song After Being Cleared Of Certificate Forgery!

A serving Senator of the Federal Republic of Nigeria and Politician, Senator Dino Melaye representing Kogi West, Central Nigeria, on the platform of the All Progressives Congress  Party (APC) is seen in the viral video below chanting away what could be transliterated to mean: 

"The person not strong enough to fight me, who is waylaying me, will eventually get beating to a pulp". 

This came after the Senator was cleared by the Ahmedu Bello University Vice Chancellor, Professor Ibrahim Graba during a recent investigative hearing of the Senate Committee on Ethics and Privileges. 

Professor Ibrahim Graba on Monday, 27th March, 2017, told the Nigerian Senate Committee that Senator "Dino Melaye" formerly known as "Daniel John Melaye", graduated from ABU University with a third class Degree in Bachelors of Arts (Honours) in Geography, in year 2000. 

Senator Maleya who said he is yet to collect the original copy of his degree certificate, told the Senate Committee that he officially changed his name from "Daniel Melaye" to "Dino Melaye" and showed readiness to present an affidavit to that effect. Dino Melaye also tendered his NYSC discharge certificate which proposed that he served between year 2000 and 2001.

The past couple of weeks witnessed the Senator being investigated for University certificate forgery. It was hitherto alleged that Senate Dino Maleya forged his certificate from the Ahmedu Bello University (ABU), Zaria, Kaduna state.

Nigerian Politics and Drama...Heaven knows WHO will eventually be beaten to a PULP! 

Woebegone - Man Jumps Off Lagos Longest Bridge, Into The Lagoon!

Could this be the ramification of Major Depressive Disorder (MDD), could the victim be caught up in the current appalling Recession or could he have suffered a major disappointment?

How best can one explain this situation where the owner of the grey Nissan SUV below, with registration number LND-476EE reportedly jumped off the Adekunle end of 3rd Mainland Bridge, Lagos-Nigeria at about 4:50 pm, on Sunday, 19th March, 2017.

Eye witness account states that the car owner, identified as 35-year-old Dr. Allwell Orji, asked his driver, Henry Ita, to stop the car so he could ease himself. The Dr got off and instead climbed and jumped off the bridge, into the Lagoon.

As at the time of filing this report, efforts was being made by officials of the Lagos State Emergency Agency to recover the corpse of the deceased, while the vehicle and the driver were taken to the Adeniji Adele Police station, Lagos Island for further investigation.

Dr. Orji, a staff of Mount Sinai Hospital, Surulere, Lagos, was reportedly on his way to a meeting organized by the Medical and Dental Council of Nigeria at Victoria Island, Lagos - Nigeria.

"New Policy Actions in The Foreign Exchange Market" Nigerians Patiently Await Windfall!

Weeks after Nigeria's Central Bank's decision to "reduce the difficulties encountered by Nigerians in obtaining foreign exchange transactions" through its "New Policy Actions in The Foreign Exchange Market"....not much can be said to have being felt on that initiative, except the recent appreciation of the Naira against the U.S Dollar which stood at =N=460 as at Friday, March 10th, 2017. The Pounds Sterling and Euro reportedly traded at =N=550 and =N=476 respectively. 

The CBN's controlled rate was at =N=399, while Interbank market floor saw the Naira closed at =N=306 to one Dollar. 

Following this development Nigerians were ecstatic to what appeared to be 'the end of the jostle for Dollar and other hard foreign currencies'; and commend the present administration for this try.  

It's essential to note that =N=450/ =N=460 was the alarming rate the Naira traded against the Dollar between November/ December 2016. This is a currency that traded against the Dollar at =N=150/180 before mid 2015 to be precise. Hence, this so called 'solace' is in my opinion pointless. But like Nigerians will always say "at-all, at-all nah eim bad pass". (meaning...It is better than nothing at all)

Confronted with this level of frustration, what could be the impediment(s) to the actualisation of the New Policy Actions? 

....Could it be that Nigeria's Financial Institutions are shunning CBN's directive to open foreign exchange branches at major Airports across the country to trade in Dollars and other foreign currencies...

....Could it be that logistics has not permitted such act...

....or Could it ultimately be that they isn't even any Dollars to trade?

I sincerely hope this is not a case of "the more you look, the less you see" act played by past, present administrations on vulnerable citizens. What ever the reason for this inexplicable delay is, Nigerians as usual, patiently await the promised and deserving "windfall".

In its effort to ensure compliance, Nigeria's Central Bank issued a circular "TO ALL AUTHORISED DEALERS UPDATE TO FOREIGN EXCHANGE DIRECTIVES dated March 3^rd, 2017, and it reads:

"In view of the CBN's willingness, capability, and determination to meet FX demand in the market, and in order to further increase foreign exchange availability to all end-users and ensure that a fair and verifiable exchange rate operates in the market, all banks are hereby directed as follows:

1. Open a teller point for retail FX transactions, including buying and selling, in all locations in order to ensure access to foreign exchange by their customers and other users, without any hindrance;

2. All banks must have an electronic display board in all their branches; showing rates of all trading currencies, and customers must insist on processing FX transactions based on the displayed rates;

3. Banks are mandated to process and meet the demand for Travel Allowances (PTA/BTA) by end-users within 24 hours of such application, as long as the endusers meet basic requirements already outlined in earlier directives;

and 4. Banks are mandated to process and meet demands for school fees and medical bills within 48 hours of such application.

Please note that this directive is effective immediately, and non-compliance would attract sanctions, including but not limited to being barred from all future CBN foreign exchange interventions."

We pray the CBN do not hesitate to come down hard on non-compliant Financial Institutions...to serve as a deterrence to others. 

Enough is enough.

Lagos Market Calls For Serious Hygiene Check!

This is Line 1, of Berlin Shopping Complex, along Marina road, one of the numerous shopping complexes at the famous Lagos Island Market, in Lagos, Nigeria.

This 'eye-saw' of over-flowing refuge has been in this state for about 2 weeks running and obviously being neglected by the Waste Management organisation responsible for making sure this particular area is clean, for reasons best known to them. 

This calls for serious hygiene check in public places to avoid epidemic out-break.

Nigeria's CBN Cash-less Policy Reviewed!

The Nigerian Central Bank (CBN) recently re-introduced and reviewed charges on cash deposits and withdrawals in the already existing cash-less states: Abia, Anambra, Ogun, Lagos, kano, Rivers and the Federal Capital territory, Abuja with effect from April 1, 2017.

This cash-less policy has also been extended to the 30 remaining states in Nigeria with commencement dates stated below: 

Bauchi, Bayelsa, Delta, Enugu, Gombe, Imo, Kaduna, Ondo, Osun, Plateau states: commences on May 1st, 2017.

Edo, Kastina, Jigawa, Niger, Oyo, Adamawa, Ebonyi, Akwa-ibom, Taraba and Nasarawa states commence on: August 1, 2017.

Kebbi,Sokoto, Bornu, Yobe, Benue, Kogi, Ekiti, Kwara, Cross-River, and Zamfara states commence on: October 1, 2017.

Charges for all cash deposits and withdrawals are as follows:

Individuals: 

Amounts less than 500,000 attracts no charges for savings and withdrawals. 

500 - 1,000,000 attracts 1.5% for deposits and 2% for withdrawals

1,000,000 - 5,000,000 attracts 2% for deposits and 3% for withdrawals

Above 5,000,000 attracts 3% for deposits and 7.5% for withdrawals.

Corporates:  

Less than 3,000,000 attracts no charges

3,000,000 - 10,000,000 2% for deposits and 5% for withdrawals

10,000,000 - 40,000,000 35 for deposits and 7.5% for withdrawals

40,000,000 and above attracts 5% for deposits and 10% for withdrawals.

Multilateral and Aid Donor Agencies, Embassies and Diplomatic missions in Nigeria are however exempted from all processing fees relating to cash-less policy implementation.

Revenue Generating Accounts of the Federal, States and Local Governments in Nigeria are equally exempted on cash deposits.